Have you ever felt like you're a misfit, trying to fit into a world that wasn't designed for you? I've been there, and I want to share my story with you. It's a messy tale of taking the wrong paths in life, finding resilience within myself to navigate the challenges, ongoing self-discovery to help myself heal and grow, and ultimately, of finding a new way to thrive in business and in life.

Hi, I’m Anyā — a non-binary, disabled & neurodivergent creative based in Singapore and this is my story.

The Early Years: Leaving Home and Discovering My Path

I was 15 when I left home, which was in India. It was 2008, and I had just won a scholarship to study in Singapore. For over a year, I had kept a newspaper clipping about this opportunity, waiting until I was old enough to apply. When the time came, I grabbed it wholeheartedly, eager to escape a home where love, though present, often felt hurtful.

I didn’t know at that time, but I grew up later to eventually learn, realize and accept that home was a toxic place for me and was often abusive at that time for me.

My parents supported me moving to Singapore despite dissenting voices around in my family of origin, and I'm grateful for that. But nothing could have prepared me for the journey of self-discovery that lay ahead from there.

In Singapore, surrounded by very smart peers, I found myself at a crossroads. I had dreams of being an ethical hacker, but my heart was pulling me towards something more creative. None of my peers were interested in this though. I had unusual Photoshop and Illustrator skills, creating graphics that my peers couldn't. I was extremely visual, though not in the traditional sense of an artist. My skills were more digital, leaning towards graphic design and graphic collaging.

But there was a problem. I was on a science scholarship, and my peers seemed to grasp concepts effortlessly while I struggled in classes. I studied harder, put in more effort, but my grades never matched theirs. The difference was glaringly obvious, and it left me feeling frustrated and out of place.

I couldn’t imagine pursuing a career in something that I felt sub-par at. Something that wouldn’t come as easily to me no matter how hard I tried. Something I felt like I was going to “lose” at regardless of how much effort I put in.

So, I made a choice. A brave, courageous choice to work on a creative portfolio and apply to design schools instead of going the traditional science route I was encouraged to take. But continuing in Singapore was challenging due to financial constraints, so I returned to India. Little did I know, this return would mark the beginning of an intense struggle with my mental health.

Navigating Mental Health Challenges

2013 was a turning point. As I started design school, my mental health challenges intensified. It began with diagnoses - OCD, depression, more medication, more therapy. Then came a psychotic episode, followed by a misdiagnosis of bipolar disorder, and finally, a suggestion of borderline personality disorder. With each label, I felt more disconnected from myself and the world around me.

That year, I hit rock bottom. I tried to end it all. But as the pills hit my stomach, I realized I didn't want to die - I just wanted the pain to end. This deep, existential pain that no amount of therapy or medication seemed to touch. I took myself to the hospital, determined to help myself. And I haven't stopped helping myself since.

It was a profound realization: the world isn't set up for me to thrive, so I need to create my own systems and support structures. At first, it felt like a burden. But over time, I've come to see it as a gentle power I can choose to wield. The more I lean into my intuition, my own rhythms, my needs, the stronger I become. The challenges continue to exist, but I’ve come to accept that navigating this world looks different for me — and I try to do what I can to set myself up to thrive under the different circumstances.

The Birth of Anya Photography and the Pivot to Brand Strategy

Graduating from photography school in 2015, I moved back to Singapore and started Anya Photography. I met wonderful clients, but soon found myself grappling with a new challenge. The fast-fashion industry I was working in left me feeling complicit in environmental waste. The anxiety and guilt became overwhelming, and I knew I needed to pivot.

So, I shifted gears. I tapped into my design background and moved into brand strategy. I was bridging the gap between business and design, finding a new way to apply my skills. But then the pandemic hit, and everything changed again.

Embracing My True Self: Neurodiversity and Chronic Illness

At around that time, my life also felt like it collapsed. My body betrayed me. Pain, inflammation, fatigue - I could barely get out of bed. Doctors couldn't tell me what was wrong. It took countless conversations, navigating the medical system, research, and advocating for myself to finally get answers. In the process, I experienced the world through the lens of disability, realizing how unprepared it is for people like me.

Slowly, painstakingly, I rebuilt my life. Not just physically, but my very identity. I had to let go of external measures of success and learn to value myself, even when I couldn't produce or achieve in the ways society expects.

Through this journey, I discovered something profound. I am autistic. I have ADHD. I am queer and non-binary. I have CPTSD and chronic illnesses like endometriosis and adenomyosis. Each realization was a piece of the puzzle, helping me understand myself better.

The Transformative Power of Pleasure Activism

But the most transformative discovery was yet to come. I stumbled upon the concept of pleasure activism by adrienne maree brown, and it changed everything. What if, instead of organizing my life around pain and struggle, I optimized for pleasure? What if things could feel easy, loving, joyful?

At first, my brain couldn't compute. Years of conditioning had taught me that hard work meant self-sacrifice, putting others' needs above my own, ignoring my intuition. But as I leaned into this new way of being, honoring my needs and my rhythms, something magical happened. I began to thrive.

This shift in perspective inevitably spilled over into my approach to business. I started questioning the startup mentality of relentless growth, the scarcity mindset that plagues so many entrepreneurs. What if we could grow slowly, sustainably, in rhythm with our own needs and values?

People gave me ridiculous judgemental stares when I talked about working less but earning more, about following my own rhythms in business. But I knew in my gut that it was possible. That we don't have to push ourselves to burnout. That slow, rhythmic, sustainable growth is not only possible but is the antidote to some of the challenges we may be facing in life.

Reimagining Business: The Rebirth of Anya Studios

And so, Anya Studios was reborn. Not as a grand plan, but as a natural evolution of my journey. It's the culmination of all I've learned - about myself, about business, about life. It's an invitation to creators, coaches, and creatives who feel in their bones that there's a different way to do business. A way that honors our authentic selves, our unique needs, our deepest values.

Maybe you're nodding along as you read this. Maybe you've felt the discomfort of trying to fit into a business model that doesn't suit you. Perhaps you're a creator who's great at what you do, but you're burning out trying to keep up with algorithms and platform demands. Or maybe you're stuck in scarcity, knowing you need to show up differently but feeling scared to take that leap.

Your Invitation to Reimagine Your Business and Life

If any of this resonates, know that you're not alone. And more importantly, know that there's another way. A way to heal your relationship with marketing, to build a business that feels aligned with who you are, to achieve financial stability without sacrificing your wellbeing. Without betraying yourself, your body, your values or your intuition.

It's not always easy. It might feel weird, awkward, or uncomfortable at first. But that's okay. Because we're in this together. We heal in connection with others, and we grow stronger in community.

Embrace Your Unique Rhythm

So here's my invitation to you: Let's reimagine what's possible for your business and for yourself. Let's explore how you can turn up authentically, how you can share your work with the world in a way that feels true to you. Let's create a business that not only sustains you financially but nourishes your soul.

Because your unique voice deserves to be heard. Your work deserves to thrive. And you deserve to do it all on your own terms, in your own rhythm.

Are you ready to begin? Let's start this journey together.